Communication using Emotional Intelligence
This blog is going to focus on how to improve our communication skills using Emotional Intelligence (EI). Why, when we have so many tools at our disposal today do we still struggle to communicate effectively. Why is it that? As a result, I am often asked this question when training leaders and managers.
Managers should realise that in order to build rapport with their staff (and to motivate them), that communication and EI plays a very important part. Do you know someone in your workplace who is a good listener, who always seems to say the right thing in the right way? They never appear offensive and are very good at calming people down? This person probably has a high EI quota.
Emotional Intelligence, as a psychological theory, was developed by Peter Salovey and John Mayer during the early 1990’s, but especially relevant was Daniel Goldman, an American Psychologist, who introduced emotional intelligence to the organisational landscape basing his works on Mayer’s research. Furthermore, Goldman developed the theory into a framework for emotional intelligence known as the ‘5 pillars of emotional intelligence’, Self-Awareness, Self-Regulation, Internal Motivation, Empathy and Social Skills. Let’s look at these in a little more detail:
- Self-Awareness. Do you recognise and understand your moods and how they affect others? Traits include self-confidence and the ability to laugh at yourself. In addition to being self-aware, you must be aware of your own emotional state.
- Self-Regulation. Can you control your feelings, your moods? Are you able to you redirect that energy to something positive? Do you think before you act? Are you open to change? Do you act with integrity and foster trust? All of these are elements of self-regulation.
- Internal Motivation. Do you work just for money and status or does it go beyond that. Do you ever consider what is important in life? Are you a curious person? Do you take joy in doing something? Do you have a strong desire to succeed and achieve. Can you remain optimistic, even in the face of adversity?
- Empathy. Can you see things from someone else’s perspective? Can you identify with people and their moods? Consequently, empathetic people are usually great when it comes to managing people as they are good at relating to others.
- Social Skills. Can you manage relationships and build networks or are you a wallflower? Do you have the ability to build rapport? How persuasive are you? Are you an effective team leader?
How to improve your Emotional Intelligence
- Observe how you react to people – Try to put yourself in their place, and be more open and accepting of their perspectives and needs.
- Look at your work environment – Do you seek attention for your accomplishments? Give others a chance to shine – rather, put the focus on them.
- What are your weaknesses? – Are you willing to accept that you’re not perfect and that you could work on some areas.
- Examine how you react to stressful situations – As a result, you may be able to keep your emotions under control when things go wrong.
- Take responsibility for your actions – Don’t ignore what you did or avoid the situation. In addition, apologise directly if necessary.
- Examine how your actions will affect others – before you take those actions.
Back | Homepage